We live in a world that runs on urgency. Notifications buzz, inboxes overflow, and expectations—both external and internal—are everywhere. For many of us, stress has become so familiar that it fades into the background, like a constant hum we barely notice anymore.
In coaching conversations, stress is almost always present. Clients may not name it directly, but it shows up as overwhelm, indecision, exhaustion, or the sense that they’re constantly behind. We coaches aren’t immune either. Holding space for others while managing full calendars, responsibilities, and personal lives can quietly take a toll. I know it does for me.
This article is the first in a short series exploring stress through a coaching lens. Not to treat stress as something that’s wrong or broken, and not to rush to solutions, but to better understand the hidden costs of chronic stress and why being aware of it matters so much in coaching.
Stress Has a Purpose—Until It Doesn’t
Stress is not inherently bad. It’s a built-in survival mechanism designed to help us respond quickly to danger. When our brain perceives a threat, the body releases hormones that sharpen focus, increase energy, and prepare us to act. In short bursts, this response can be incredibly useful.
The challenge is that our nervous systems evolved for short-term threats, not for constant activation. Most of today’s stressors aren’t life-threatening, yet our bodies often react as if they are. Deadlines, financial pressure, difficult conversations, and nonstop stimulation can all trigger the same response.
When stress becomes ongoing rather than occasional, it stops being helpful. Instead of supporting performance, it begins to interfere with clear thinking, emotional regulation, and recovery. This is where stress quietly shifts from ally to obstacle.
When Stress Becomes the Baseline (The Caffeine Effect)
Think about what happens when someone drinks too much caffeine. A single cup of coffee can feel energizing at first. Over time, though, the body adapts. It takes more caffeine to get the same effect, and without it, fatigue and irritability set in.
Stress works in a similar way. When we’re stressed frequently, the body becomes accustomed to elevated levels of stimulation. What once felt intense starts to feel normal. Busyness becomes a default state. Urgency starts to feel necessary. Slowing down can even feel uncomfortable.
For many clients (and many coaches) this heightened state becomes the baseline. We may not recognize how stressed we are because it’s simply how life feels. From a coaching perspective, this matters. A nervous system that’s constantly revved up has less capacity for reflection, creativity, and shifting perspective.
Acute Stress vs. Chronic Stress: Why the Difference Matters in Coaching
Not all stress is the same. Acute stress is short-term and situational. It’s what you feel when something sudden or intense happens—an emergency, a close call, a high-stakes moment. While acute stress can be taxing, it usually resolves pretty quickly once the situation passes.
Chronic stress is different. It’s the low-grade, persistent pressure that lingers day after day. It may come from workload, financial strain, caregiving responsibilities, or the constant sense of needing to keep up. There’s no clear endpoint, and little opportunity for the body to fully reset.
From a coaching standpoint, chronic stress is particularly important to recognize. It can affect how clients process information, make decisions, and engage with the coaching process itself. Chronic stress narrows attention and reduces cognitive flexibility—the very qualities coaching is designed to support.
The Coaching Cost of Chronic Stress
When clients are under chronic stress, it often shows up in subtle but consistent ways. They may struggle to prioritize, feel scattered when setting goals, or cycle through the same challenges without meaningful progress. Sessions can feel urgent but unfocused, busy but unproductive.
It’s easy for coaches to misinterpret these patterns. A stressed client may appear unmotivated, resistant, or inconsistent. In reality, their system may simply be overloaded. Chronic stress can drain the mental and emotional energy needed for insight and follow-through.
There’s also a cost for us as coaches. Chronic stress can affect our ability to stay fully present, grounded, curious, and engaged. It can reduce our patience, decrease the quality of our listening, and make sessions feel more difficult than they need to be. Over time, this can contribute to burnout, even in work we care deeply about.
Recognizing the role of stress doesn’t mean coaching turns into stress management. It means we become more skillful at noticing and exploring the conditions that support or limit a client’s capacity for growth.
Awareness Before Action: A Coaching-Aligned First Step
In a culture that loves quick fixes, it’s tempting to jump right into strategies. But when it comes to stress, awareness is often the most powerful starting point.
For coaches, this means noticing patterns—both in ourselves and in our clients. When does urgency dominate the conversation? Where does overwhelm show up again and again? What seems to drain energy rather than restore it?
Awareness opens the door for choice. When stress is named and observed, it’s no longer just background noise. Clients can begin to distinguish between external pressures and internal responses. Coaches can make more intentional decisions about pacing, focus, and presence.
Rather than asking, “How do we fix this?” more useful questions might be, What’s happening here? What does it make possible (or impossible) right now?
In the posts ahead, we’ll explore how chronic stress affects clarity and decision-making, what it means for coaching presence, and practical ways coaches can support clients who are navigating high levels of stress.
For now, simply notice. Stress becomes far easier to work with once we stop treating it as invisible.
As you reflect on these things, I’d love to hear what you notice about how stress may be affecting your work as a coach. Feel free to leave a comment here or reach out to me directly.
